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X-Men #5

The X-Men fight the new Reavers in X-Men #5, by writer Gerry Duggan, artists Javier Pina and Ze Carlos, colorist Erick Arciniega, and letterer Clayton Cowles. This is yet another dud of an issue, full of bad Duggan-isms and just plain terrible writing.

The issue opens with the X-Men beaten by the Reavers and then flashes back to Polaris helping get rid of a nuclear reactor. Then, it flashes back to the vote on who would be part of the X-Men on Krakoa, where Jean Grey changes Polaris's mind about wanting to be on the team, then flashes forward, but not to the beginning of the issue but to the X-Men fighting more monsters before the fight at the nuclear power plant. Then it goes back to the present, where Polaris magnetically manipulates Wolverine's body until she wakes up. At this point, the X-Men beat the Reavers. Later, in New York, Ben Urich comes to Cyclops as the X-Men are handing out food to tell him that he has proof of mutant resurrection. Still, he isn't going to run the story yet.

The sins this issue commits are manifold. Let's start at the beginning. The first page is all clunky exposition about how the Reavers showed up and beat the X-Men. Right off the bat, Duggan is breaking a rule of fiction- show, don't tell. For any discerning reader, this should take them out of the book immediately. He immediately wastes Sunfire because, God forbid, he actually does anything in this book and then jumps into a flashback. Now, his portrayal of Polaris has definitely been a choice, and there's an undercurrent of #girlboss to it that's kind of terrible and out of character for Polaris. However, at least she's getting some kind of characterization, which is very rare for any character in this book. The whole segment of the nuclear power plant flashback seems kind of long and purposeless. It's probably supposed to show Polaris's discontent over knowing that Jean Grey messed with her mind, but it doesn't work at all if that is the case. It just feels like a snarky little thing that happens in the story.

Duggan goes with the characterization of Jean Grey as the kind of person who messes with other people’s minds because she knows better than them. This is pretty mystifying because that was never a Jean Grey characteristic until the Bendis run, being more something Professor X or Emma Frost would do. From there, there's the useless flashback to the X-Men fighting more monsters, which is supposed to show readers that Doctor Stasis is watching but is all in all kind of dumb and seems like it's actually there to set up a joke later in the book that's terrible. Oh, and Polaris puppets Wolverine around, which seems extra bad because that's basically what Jean Grey did to her. Later in the issue, Polaris forgives Jean for doing what she did because Jean was right, blah blah blah, and the whole plot point seems useless. Why even bring it up? Another ridiculous thing is that Doctor Stasis is watching Ben Urich talk to Cyclops through a window with a parabolic microphone pointed at them. He's the big bad, and he's doing his own surveillance.

This is all terrible. None of it is good. Duggan's writing on this title has reached an all-new low. Here are two more things. The Reavers he uses are entirely new ones who are super generic. Why not use the originals? They're cyborgs; they've been rebuilt a million times. Why introduce new ones when there are already good Reavers out there? It's mystifying. Wolverine and Synch talk about how they have to talk. Eventually. Just, you know, not yet. It's infuriating.

The art is good but nothing special. The Reaver's design is bad.

X-Men #5 is a terrible comic. There's really no other way to put it. Duggan messes up from the first page and then never really recovers. In fact, he continually makes the book worse and worse until the end. This is kind of okay until it gets to the part with the big bad with a parabolic microphone watching Cyclops and Urich through a window. Pina and Carlos get nothing great to draw, and their art is fine, except for the Reavers, who look sooo very bad. This issue isn't comically bad, where can you laugh at it. It's just really, really bad.

Grade: F